Have you ever had that moment when you thought 'if only __, I would be happy?' This week Dr. Larry Markson discusses that precise moment and how we can make the decision to be happy.
Happiness is a One Way Decision
At my Cabin Experiences we spend a significant amount of time speaking about happiness and fulfillment. During one exercise I ask, “What would make you happy?” Seemingly, that is an innocuous and simple question and the answers that are received sound plausible and correct – but they are not right.
The vast majority of answers have to do with “When this or that happens – or when I get this or that, then I will be happy.” When my daughter gets married; when my practice or business grows; when I make more money; when I move to a bigger home or when I meet my soul mate” – are examples of what I hear. You get the idea!
When something good happens to you or in your life, then you will be happy, but until then you will remain in varying degrees of unhappiness, frustration, concern or worry. It is Outside-In thinking and totally ignores the Inside-Out proposition that happiness is a decision, not a happening or event.
Surely, being happy doesn’t come naturally to everybody, but I believe it is your birthright to be happy and you can deliberately choose happiness everyday.
Our lives are rich with potential sources of happiness, but sometimes we have been trained over time to become victims of negative thinking. Many have come to believe that focusing on all that has gone wrong will provide us with the motivation we need to face the challenges of survival.
When we choose to focus on what makes us happy, however, a shift occurs in the fabric of our existence. Finding something to be happy about every single day can help this shift take place.
Happiness may not always come easily into your life. Remember that you have been conditioned to believe that the proper response to unmet expectations is one of sadness, anger, guilt, or fear.
To make happiness a fixture in your existence, you must first accept that it is within your power to choose happiness over unhappiness every single day. Then, each time you discover some new source of happiness, the notion that the world is a happy place will find its way more deeply into your heart and mind.
Yes, believe it or not, happiness is your choice and it starts with your decision to leave your story behind and DECIDE TO BE HAPPY.